I started someone on a new exercise today, and realized that her work is work we all should be doing. She’s losing respect for her husband because he’s not making enough money to support them and maintain their nice lifestyle. She’s really pissed at him. She’s trying to be compassionate, but can’t seem to get to that over her anger. As we talked, she uttered: “That’s what I was taught. My Dad did it, so should he.”
Throughout our lives we’ve been inundated with the opinion of others about what defines the perfect man, what we deserve, and what is considered as acceptable and unacceptable in a suitor. He must be attractive…he better keep you laughing…your friends should all adore him…he needs to be professional and provide for you…if he makes less money than you – watch out – he’ll be intimidated…he has to share your religion…real men are muscular. And then we get the cherry on the relationship sundae: don’t settle for anyone who isn’t perfect for you!
Whether it’s from your family, your friends, Cosmo, or Oprah; you’ve been soaking up this input for years. On top of that, I’m betting you believe things today that you decided when you were 16. Remember when you and your friends all agreed that being cute was a valid man measurement and deal-breaker?
Time to parse out your truth from fiction girlfriend. What do you believe? Who is your “perfect man?” Reeeaaaally????
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