I know I sound like a broken record about the benefits of dating online, especially if you are single and over 40. I’m going to continue to nag you about this because I want what you want: for you to find the man of your dreams, and to never let each other go.
Getting online is the best way to make that happen.
Go ahead, take the test, I promise you’ll learn things about how to meet the RIGHT MEN online, the RIGHT way. Like your mother used to say “You’ll thank me later.”
True or False:
1. You should never respond if a guy just “winks” at your profile and doesn’t email first.
2. Spelling or grammatical errors tell you a lot about the man.
3. It’s important to list your requirements and deal breakers in your online profile.
4. Run your profile by your best girlfriends to get their feedback before posting.
5. Never overtly flirt in your initial emails. He’ll get the wrong idea.
6. It’s OK to email him again if he doesn’t respond at first.
7. If a man you haven’t yet met doesn’t call when he says he will or get back to you within a week, forget him and move on.
Multiple Choice:
8. The fastest growing segment of online daters is :
A) Over 30 year olds
B) Over 40 year olds
C) Over 50 year olds
9. In a recent AARP study of over 50 year olds what percentage are currently in love:
A) 40%
B) 55%
C) 70%
10. In this same study, what percentage of over 65 year olds report being passionately in love:
A) 25%
B) 46%
C) 60%
(I know these last two were not directly about online dating, but I want you to get some perspective on how many people over 50 are in love. And just know that can be you!)
Answers:
1. You should never respond if a guy just “winks” at your profile and doesn’t email first.
False. In general I advise to wait for an email, but if someone catches your eye and winks at you, go ahead and respond. Larry winked at me, sister. I’m glad I answered back! When opportunity arises, on or offline…seize the moment!
2. Spelling or grammatical errors tell you a lot about the man.
False. Some of the most brilliant people are horrible spellers. Don’t let it be a deal breaker unless “Good Speller” is on your must-have list. (What else is on your deal breaker list that really isn’t that important?)
3. It’s important to list your requirements and deal breakers in your online profile.
False. Your profile is not an order sheet for a man, it’s about selling you to the right guy. You can check most deal breakers in the basic selection sections like smoking, kids, etc You can work out the rest later.
4. Run your profile by your best girlfriends to get their feedback before posting.
False. If your girlfriend loves it, it probably sucks. Your profile needs to appeal to men who don’t yet know you, not your girlfriends to know and love you. Understanding how men think and feel is a critical part of, not just dating success, but success in a long term relationship.
5. Never overtly flirt in your initial emails. He’ll get the wrong idea.
False. It’s actually good to flirt a bit, just don’t go overboard or be explicit. (I’ll show you how to do this.*) I always recommend showing interest. Then let him lead from there.
6. It’s OK to email him again if he doesn’t respond at first.
True. If you are really, really interested try again after a month. There are some good reasons this happens. Do it in a classy way and if he doesn’t answer, nothing lost…move on.
7. If a man you haven’t yet met doesn’t call when he says he will or get back to you within a week, forget him and move on.
True, Sorta. You don’t have any real connection with a man until you meet him. The truth is that the online dating world can be fickle. If you haven’t met yet I’d give him a little leeway. If he says he’ll call Wednesday and he doesn’t until Friday, I’d give him a break. He doesn’t owe you anything…yet.
8. The fastest growing segment of online daters is:
C. 50 year olds – So no more excuses!!
9. In a recent AARP study of over 50 year olds what percentage are currently in love?
C. 70%. Isn’t that encouraging?
10. What percentage of over 65 year olds report being passionately in love?
B. 46%. Don’t underestimate the intensity with which we can both give and receive love later in life!
Dating after 40 is not the same as when you were 30! Add in the new arena of online dating and the challenges multiply. But it’s clear that there is a lot of love and passion to be had at this time in your life, so it’s just a matter of keeping your eye on the prize and using the internet to your advantage.
It’s not easy but it’s a heck of a lot better than the singles bars that were one of the only options “way back when.” At least you can look for men while you are in your jammies and not feel like a piece of meat.
I’m going to push you, encourage you, educate you and nag you until online dating is at least part of your repertoire. Helping you find the love you want and desire is my passion and commitment. It’s for your own good and, like I said, you can thank me later.
Thank you for your helpful advice. I am finding I am more confident that I have been in years. I am also learning that flirting does not mean it is sexual!! Do you have plans for visiting the Mid West??? I would love to attend a conference with you as a speaker.
Nelle