Today’s excerpt is from page 16 in my eBook. It’s about putting aside your harsh attitudes based on fear and past experience, and extending kindness to the man sitting in front of you. Not only is it the right and nice thing to do, it will exponentially open up your dating and romance possibilities.
Kindness…With Men – Commandment #1
Hold your judgments. Quick judgments are often in response to a lot of things that have nothing to do with the man sitting in front of you. You would want him to judge you based solely on what he sees in you; not what he saw in the last three women he dated. You owe him the same kindness.
That means when you meet a man who has a job, a haircut, stature, or a sense of humor that you “instantly” don’t like, stop! and take time to see him as a complete person. Show him the same initial acceptance and generosity that you would show an acquaintance or the woman you meet at a business mixer. Doing this not only shows kindness, but it makes your chances of meeting a fantastic man far greater.
This was a huge epiphany for my client Diana. I worked with her on this our first couple sessions. She saw her propensity to judge very quickly (out of self-defense, by the way) and she vowed to “go out with compassion” and not judge men so quickly.
This was an instant change in her experience. With this awareness, and a little practiced self-talk, she suddenly saw many men who were possible suitors. That’s only because she gave them a second chance when one thing about them bugged her. Funny how if you can get past the way a man dresses or uses his fork, you often end up seeing a nice guy who might be okay to spend some time with.
Next…Self Awareness…With Men.